This morning, I got up to use the bathroom. It was about the hour that I usually do tai chi, but a little early, so I went back to bed. But, I was awake. So I picked up my computer and started fussing around — reading Facebook posts, finding out the news (does anyone respectable have anything positive to say about Clint Eastwood losing an argument with an empty chair? Probably not), and so on. It’s been the first few days of school, so I’m a bit behind on this news-gathering, and it takes me a while.
And I realize I’m not actually news-gathering. I’m stalling.
Up and at ’em. But stepping from the cool bedroom to the hot office is an exercise in tolerance. I’m sweaty in minutes, but not the sort of sweat that comes from good exercise — that grungy, slightly gritty sweat that comes from working in a humid space after a few hours in a cool one, and doing hard work. Discomfort during tai chi I can manage.
This business of feeling every twinge and tweak, though…. it’s been such a good week. I’ve had my food consumption under control, and I ate really well both at home and at school. I avoided all but one of the ice cream socials, and I was good there. Lots of veggies, lots of fruit, no wheat, no heavy carbs, and so on. Why this twinge in my shoulder? Why this creak in my knee? Where is this ache in my lower back coming from? These weren’t here yesterday?
I finish the three exercise sets, and the relief is honest. Thank goodness that’s over.
But part of me understands that this is those parts of my mind that don’t want to do tai chi every morning, fighting back. My body doesn’t always want to get out of bed and do these exercises; my brain resists the order — I’m too hot; this twinge might be serious; this temperature is just too warm or too cold or the sky is the wrong shade of blue today. My brain is presenting the excuses.
For today, at least, I’ve done the work.