Steven Pressfield has a book out called Do the Work and another called the War of Art. In both rants (screeds?) he demonstrates that the feeling of the rising energy has nothing to do with the results. Magicians say the same. In the middle of today’s taiji practice, the sense of energy that accompanies a good working session vanished. Instead of feeling tingly all over, instead of feeling like a body of energy within a skin, I felt like… me. I was as human and as ordinary as they come.
I did the work anyway. I finished the form, doing my best to breathe correctly and step correctly and position hands correctly. I did all right, but the usual internal clues that come from taiji, to tell you you’re doing it right, were just not present.
Oh well. Some days you’re a body of energy. Some days you’re just a bag of meat. Do the work anyway. Eventually you’ll realize you’re a body of energy and a bag of meat at the same time.